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In Iran, nothing is more important than the marriage – Aroussi- which is a sacred institution, but like, really so sacred. We’ll discuss another time the famous Persian “Khastegari”, which consists in presenting, with the agreement of both families, a man – ideally the perfect son-in-law – who would court a woman to marry him. It is a form of an improved”arranged marriage”, because, as you know now, Iranian girls, will never let themselves be pushed around, even by their parents. The final choice returns to them, naturally. As mentioned an article in French magazine L’OBS this week, about arranged marriages of Isfahan: “Nowadays, it is the girl who decides everything”.
Khastegari is such a long story, but we’ll tell you soon anything you need to know about that!
Today let’s focus on the famous “Sofreh Afgd”.
Besides the necessary “loving” commitment for an union, there is another huge commitment, one that take your entire soule: it’s the iconic, the vital “Sofreh Aghd”, literally ” the table of engagement ” or ” ceremony of engagement “.
Let us tell you something very Persian: Not a beautiful “Sofreh Aghd”? it’s not going to happen.
So how The Iranians made the Sofreh Aghd a national competition? Because yes, believe us, it is a high-level sport perfectly mastered by Iranian women. Many agencies are specialized in Sofreh Aghd arrangement in Iran, it’s like the wedding planner in the West actually. You could find the best type of Sofreh, and also… the worst.
Let’s first explain the symbolics elements, the thousand year old story of Zoroastrian Persian wedding: They all bring good luck and happiness to the bride and groom* :
A Mirror and two Candelabras (Ayneye-Bakht va Shamdan) – Symbols of purity, light, and brightness. The first thing which the groom sees in the mirror is the reflection of his would be wife after she removes her veil.
Termeh – A beautiful silk embroidered cloth symbolizing tradition.
Spice Tray (Sini-Ye Aatel-O-Baatel)– Tray of seven herbs and spices to guard against the evil eye. These include: Poppy Seeds, Wild Rice, Angelica, Salt, Nigella Seeds, Black Tea, and Frankincense.
Decorated Flatbread (Naan Sangak) – Foundation of prosperity for the feasts of the couple’s life together.
Decorated Eggs, Walnuts, Almonds, and Hazelnuts – Fruitfulness and good fertility. Symbolize the hope that the marriage will be as strong as the shells of these nuts.
Honey – For the first taste of the new life as a couple.
Two Sugar Cones (Kalleh Ghand) – To shower the couple with sugar symbolizing sweetness and happiness for a good life together.
Wild Rue (Espand) – Believed to keep away the evil eye and bring good health.
Sweets and Pastries (Shirini) – To be shared with the guests after the ceremony as a means to share the sweetness and happiness with everyone.
Sugar/Ghand Cloth – A piece of fabric made of silk or other fine fabric to be held over the bride and groom’s head throughout the ceremony by female relatives or friends.
Sacred Book – An open book of Persian Poetry or other Holy Book depending on faith
Traditionally, sofreh aghd is set on the floor, but now, the modern version is on tables. It has to face the East, the direction of sunlight so the bride and groom will be facing the light. Light, is the essence of Zoroastrianism, the first monotheist religion of the world and the real Persian roots. Now you know how Iranians are attached to symbols and different superstitions, for instance, they believe in “Cheshme” – literally “the evil eye”. Before the ceremony, the bride family burnt esfand, a special incense, famous for rejecting the evil eye. Popular beliefs say that the groom’s family (specially the mother) would potentially be that evil eye!
We’ll finish this special Sofreh issue with sharing some photos from the most beautiful, , blinger, sober style, classical, craziest ones… a condensed Iranian love affair:
And, of course, one of the Persian wedding traditional song “Shah Damad” by Viguen, a famous Iranian singer: